My Life as a Single Christian and God’s Unexpected Curveball

My LIfe as1

Being single is a struggle sometimes. Of course being married is its own struggle. Just being a human being is hard and rife with unexpected circumstances no matter what your relationship status is on Facebook.

But because I haven’t dealt with the struggle of being married, I can only talk about what it’s like to be single.

I’ve written about a lot of personal things. But one of the things I haven’t written about much is my first romantic relationship. Partially because for a while I was too emotional to be fair in writing about it and I respect the guy I dated too much to trash talk him on the Internet; in ten years when I’m a super famous author, I don’t want people to troll him. I’m joking but the INTERNET IS FOREVER, PEOPLE. Also, I haven’t told my story publicly because it wasn’t just my story to tell, but if my story of being single is gonna make any sense, you’re gonna need a little background info.

Aside from a guy I wouldn’t even let drive me to prom my senior year, I didn’t date anyone at all til I was a freshman in college. Then when I was 18, a sophomore began pursuing me hard. In my mind, the beginning of our relationship was chick flick level perfect. It was equal parts cheesy and sweet and I loved it. If you were at MCC between Fall 2011 and Spring 2012, you most likely saw us sitting on a swing multiple times. We were smitten. It wasn’t long before we were talking marriage. I don’t mean in the abstract “make sure you’re both on the same page” way. I mean we had our lives planned out. We talked baby names and where we would live. I had the next 50-70 years mapped out and I loved it.

But we weren’t ready for a serious commitment like that so things went south and the relationship ended. I was devastated. But life went on and I adjusted to being single again.

At first, all I wanted was to go back to the first relationship. Then I wanted to be loved and adored by someone new. Thinking back, I was getting obsessed with the idea of being in a relationship. I still had standards, but I was no longer ok with being single. However, as time passed and I got used to being comfortable alone, I got so sick of hearing myself and others lament their lack of romantic partners. I was convinced that viewing being single as a curse was wrong and not biblical. So I took to heart Paul’s message in 1 Corinthians 7 about how it’s better to be unattached. I even read the passage multiple times a day when I was feeling especially discontent. And gradually I became content with being single. To further convince myself and others, I arrogantly preached to anyone who I thought needed to hear it how God didn’t promise us spouses and being single isn’t some curse.

Both of those statements are so true, and while I don’t retract my statements, I do apologize for the spirit they were said and thought in. God didn’t call me to be a beacon for single girls everywhere. That’s someone else’s job and may she fill her role with the grace, love and softness I abandoned.

Because strength doesn’t lie in bravado or assurance. It lies in gentleness and quiet perseverance. It’s the ability to keep going and stay compassionate and not let life make you hard.

No, Jesus didn’t call me to singleness and he’s recently revealed that to me. He very firmly told me “Jackie, you’ve preached singleness for so long but I made you for marriage. I made you for nurturing.”

Which was kind of jarring to hear. My first thought was something along the lines of “What do you mean I’m made for marriage? Why have I worked so hard to be ok alone for the past few years if you didn’t want me to be alone forever?” I don’t really know the answer to that question except that I am alone now and I might still be alone during my life. Because I don’t know whether I am made for marriage with a man on earth or to be a part of the Bride of Christ and lovingly serve through the church. Maybe I will nurture children of my own or maybe I will give my love and time to other people’s kids. But as a Christian, I’m not called to be know everything; I am called to be faithful and that’s what I’m trying to do.

For a while I needed to learn how to be independent and comfortable on my own but I’ve learned that lesson. Now it’s time to work in cultivating the qualities of a biblical wife. I’m not discontent in my singleness but I am seeking the Lord daily and preparing to be a helpmeet and learning about submission and gentleness. I’m kind of excited about it. I’ve got this new challenge in my life and I’m learning more about the different ways to glorify God with my life. It’s a struggle every step of the way and it’s hard but I’m going to keep trying and relying on his strength and grace til He sends me the unexpected, life shaking challenge. Til then, y’all.

The World Needs More Love Letters

The World Needs More Love Letters

The 12 days of love letter writingHey y’all.

One of my favorite bloggers, is this fabulous girl named Hannah Brencher (or HB for short).

A few years ago, HB started a super cool thing called More Love Letters (MLL). It’s mission is simple: spread love to the world through love letters. I’m not talking about romantic love letters, though a little old fashioned romance is never a bad idea. What I’m talking about is leaving a letter for a stranger to find in your favorite book store or at a coffee show. The idea is to sprinkle the world with words of love.

In addition to encouraging people to send letters on their own, MLL takes requests of love letters to send.

This Christmas, I have the honor of telling you about a great lady you can send Christmas love to this season as a part of The 12 Days of Love Letter Writing.

Her name is Verna and she is an 83 year old widow. Verna is one of those older ladies who has chosen not to sit around and morn. When her husband died a few years ago, she learned how to take care of household finances. Verna went on living. She even went on a hot air balloon ride with her grandkids recently because it was on her bucket list.

But doing awesome things during the day won’t keep you warm at night. Verna needs to be reminded of how much love is in the world.

This Christmas, add one more Christmas card to your list. Send a letter to Verna and cover her in words of love.

Verna’s address is:

Verna’s bundle

℅ Jennifer K.

7660 Audubon Meadow Way

Alexandria, VA 22306



For more information about this go to or

(P.S., Know someone who could use some cheering up in the form of letters? Check out the requests page for More Love Letters).

PhotoCredTiffanyFarley (12)

And I’m off to write my letter to Verna!

Love, Jackie

Disney Princesses Can Be Good Role Models

Disney Princesses Can Be Good Role Models

I get tired of hearing people complain about Disney princesses being too thin or similar or not independent enough, etc.

That very well may be true at times but when I watch a Disney princess movie, I am not expecting to watch a movie that will change the way I look at society or affirm important cultural values. I go watch it because I want to see a fairy tale. I want to see a girl in pretty dresses meet a handsome prince/beast/scoundrel.

It’s like peanuts. Sometimes I really want peanuts. Sometimes I want almonds. They are both good and both have value. But it wouldn’t be fair of me to be disappointed that a jar of peanuts doesn’t have almonds in it.

I have another bone to pick with people who complain about the princesses not rescuing themselves or being independent.

First I would assert that all the characters are a product of their time. Back in the 50s, people thought the way Snow White sang was enjoyable. But in 2010, we had a pop singer as the princess in Tangled. Times change and the princess change with the times.

Second, every single one of the Disney princesses has something in common other than being pretty. They are FIERCE. They are TOUGH AS NAILS.

Snow White’s step mom tries to get her assassinated but Snow White doesn’t let that get her down. She cries for a little while and gets over it and starts living her new. Sure later on Prince Charming saves her but in the beginning the very first Disney Princess saves herself and set a great example for all for her successors.

Ahh. Cinderella. Good ole Cinderella. She was the first I remember watching and I think she sets a great example that Snow White would be proud of. She takes care of herself and she gets things done. Cinderella wanted to go to the ball so Cinderella found a way, despite incredible adversity, to go to the ball. She wasn’t afraid of hard work, and even though her Step Mom was a bully, Cinderella never saw herself as a victim.

Next came Aurora from The Sleeping Beauty. I’ve only seen the movie all the way through once so I can’t really defend Aurora. Honestly, she’s the only one I’d say was too passive because it seems like all she does is walk around all la di da. I do love the scene with the fairies fighting over whether or the the dress should be pink or blue though.

And then in 1989 came one of my favorites and, in my opinion, one of the best Disney movies, The Little Mermaid. Ariel is a much different princess than Snow White. Ariel actually has a living, loving parents. But the generation that grew up with Ariel no longer thought “father knows best” or that parents were infallible. This generation tested boundaries – as did Ariel. She made some poor choices fueled by passion and infatuation for a fantasy and not logic. But you know how she responds to the consequences of those bad choices? She goes on living her life. She realizes the depth of her father’s love for her.

Three years later, came my favorite Disney Princess, Belle! To be fair, I should explain that my mom always extolled the virtues of Beauty and The Beast because Belle fell in love with who he was and not what he looked like. But that’s not the only good thing about Belle. Belle has substance. She’s ok with being different. She won’t marry the most handsome man in town just because he deigned to look twice at her. Then when danger comes and her dad is missing, she doesn’t go ask anyone for help. She goes out and saves him. She sacrifices herself for father. Then later she saves her father from being thrown into an asylum by greedy people. Belle is TENACIOUS.

But she is also tender, and I think that’s so important. She shows this unloved, terrifying creature that he is lovable and he is worthy and through that he’s able to show his more vulnerable side. I think it’s important that little girls and little boys see that treating someone with kindness and respect is the right thing to do, no matter who the person is.

Next come the ones that are more recognizably fierce and tough.

Jasmine stands up to and for her father. She refuses to be bullied by Jafar. Plus she has a pet tiger. Anyone with a pet tiger is fierce.

If you’re questioning whether or not Mulan is tough… Just go rewatch the movie. And if you’re still unsure, then I don’t know what to say to you because Mulan joined an army to save her father. And yes, I realize she isn’t a princess and doesn’t marry a prince BUT Disney calls her a princess so she’s included. Plus I love her and “reflection” totally resonated with me with a teenager.

I have pretty much the same thing to say about Pocahontas as I did about Mulan. She’s got a little bit of Ariel in her too. Overprotective father, curiousity, the need to be free. But more important than all that is her need for the world to be just. She doesn’t try to save John Smith because he’s handsome, though it doesn’t hurt. She tries to save him because killing him would be wrong and she’s not afraid to stand up for what she believes in.

Tiana, Merida, Rapunzel and Anna and Elsa are obviously fierce and strong. I think there are important lessons to be learned from all of them.

Tiana might be the most impressive of the princesses. She gets things done. She doesn’t whine and she doesn’t quit. She makes life the way she wants it to be #goals

Rapunzel teaches the lesson of having and going after your dreams. Frozen is all about family and the importance of that love.

I haven’t seen Brave but from what I hear it’s about independence.

I do have one qualm about the pervasiveness of the Disney Princess movies in the last 25 years. From 1937-1988 we got 3 princess movies. From 1989-2015, we’ve gotten eight new princesses and one queen. I think that says more about society than the way the princesses dress or the way they act. Part of the reason for the increase may be due to technology advances or an increase in animators.

Regardless of the reason why, let’s quit criticizing the Disney princesses, even the ones from past who seemed passive. If you have a problem with the pervasiveness of princess memorabilia, encourage your child to watch Doc McStuffins or an educational show on PBS (that’s totally what I grew up on and I think I turned out fine). Get your girls to read historical fiction like the American Girl doll series or the Girls of Many Lands books also by American girl. Laura Ingalls and her sisters make excellent role models in the Little House series. They are so many more options. Let them watch Cinderella and then follow it up with something more obviously empowering towards women.

Be on the lookout for a post about books all kids should read because I just got really excited revisiting my childhood!

Tips for surviving the post grad entry level job hunt. Part 1: living with your parents

Tips for surviving the post grad entry level job hunt. Part 1: living with your parents

The Post Grad's Guide to living with parents after graduating from college
In May, I moved back in with my parents and started getting serious about my job hunt. While I still don’t have a job, I’ve learned a few things about how to handle living at home when you’re at an age where you feel independent. This will be the first post in my series on navigating the post college world without going crazy.

Dear Mama and Daddy, I am so thankful to be living at home for free. I love you both very much. You might want to skip ahead to the end where I talk about the good parts of the experience, though.

Here’s what you need to know about living in your parents home

  • Say goodbye to privacy

For the past 2 to 4 years, you lived on your own and did whatever you wanted whenever you wanted. But now you’re not paying rent… Or living with roommates who don’t care if you stay out late or stay in bed for an entire weekend. You’re living with the people who created you and who are paying all the bills for the house you’re living in.

If your parents are anything like my parents, they will walk in your room without knocking. They will ask you where you’re going when you leave the kitchen even if you’re only going to the bathroom.

And God forbid you ever want to be lazy for no reason and lie in bed all day watching Grey’s Anatomy on Netflix. Being a parent means being a responsible adult. They don’t quite understand the urge to be extremely lazy every so often (though to be fair, I have many peers who also don’t understand it). Which brings me to my next point…

  • Say hello to judgment.

Don’t get me wrong. My parents are great. But my roommates didn’t judge me for doing stuff like binge watching Netflix or being on my cell phone too much. If I wanted to be bad and get Oreos, my roommates didn’t tell me I need to be healthier, they got their own package of Oreos and were bad with me. Your parents probably will judge stuff. I mean it’s because they love you and want the best for you. I have this suspicion that they think you’re wasting all the wonderful potential they gave you when you waste your time on inane or unhealthy things… They’re not necessarily wrong so try to take it with a grain of salt. Feel free to rant about it to your friends or siblings when you need to get it off your chest though.

  • Expect to be the errand runner.

“Oh, my grown up child lives at home? I can make her/him do anything I want! I need groceries? Let’s give our child the list. Left something in the other room. No need to waste energy on stuff like standing up and walking. The graduate can get it. S/he’s young and capable.”

This is the monologue I think occasionally goes on in my parents head. The same goes for personal maid. How the parents did things like load the dishwasher and set the table before you moved back in, I don’t know. But you parents will not waste free labor. So get used to things like doing other people’s laundry (gasp!).

  • Junk. Junk everywhere.

During college, your room became your room + the extra storage room. There’s also the issue of your room having embarrassing journals from when you were 12 and a whole lot of other stuff you haven’t touched in years plus the extra stuff you accumulated throughout college. *This one probably doesn’t apply to everyone, but it was definitely an issue for me. 

While living with my parents has been an adjustment for sure, it’s been good. Most of what I’ve mentioned are the downsides, but there are so many upsides. I love getting to know my parents as a grown up. There’s a whole other dynamic to our relationship now that I’m old enough to take care of myself. My mom and I have Boggle game nights. Last week, I was sick, and I was able to whine to my mom. That’s probably the worst part about college: when you’re sick you have to take care of yourself and be a grown up. But if you live at home, you can act like a child when your sick. So it’s a struggle and a learning experience, but it’s definitely rewarding and fun.

Comment and let me know if you’ve had a similar experience moving back in with your parents. Did you have issues I didn’t mention? Let me know. I’d love to let you vent 🙂

Don’t forget to share if you know of anyone who needs to know this or would appreciate it!

Be on the lookout for the next tip in the Post Grad Guide next week. Let me know if you have any particular topic you’d like to talk about!

The Post Grad Guide is a series on entering the real world after graduation because it's a jungle out there


Sometimes I don’t like to blog because I know that not as many people will read it unless it’s accompanied by the perfect graphic or if the layout of my blog doesn’t scream “Jackie.” I get so bogged down by the design aspects, of which I am good but not great nor do I have the right programs. I get so bogged down by my blog not being pretty enough that I forget that my words can be pretty. Because I am not a cutesy, artsy person who always chooses the right instagram filter. I am not always wearing the latest designer or fashion trend because I like what I like whether it’s popular or not. Wanting to dress in your own style and not just what’s popular can be REALLY tough. But I do it. There are many fads that I never participated in simply because I didn’t like it for myself. There were ones that I did participate in because I like it. I own and often wear a pair of Chacos. I like them, they’re comfortable and they work well for my flat feet.I know it seems like I’m rambling but my rambling has a point.

It is SO important to be authentic. To be genuine. People want to see the real you. They don’t want to see the perfectly polished version you put forth on social media. There’s a reason people like celebs like Zooey Deschanel, Jennifer Lawrence and Taylor Swift. When you see them in magazines, tv, social media, etc. you get the feeling that you could be friends with them. We feel that way about them and other celebrities, because they are genuine. They are real.

Wanna know something fun? Nobody likes it when you or I are disingenuous (aka insincere or fake for the friends that I know who get irritated at me for using big words in conversations).

People want to see the real, raw, messy you. This is me giving you permission to share with others that you’re not that great sometimes. This is me telling one of my favorite youth Sunday School teachers that the job search is really hard and it’s really frustrating instead of my stock answer of “it’s going good.”

This is not me giving you permission to only complain though. Celebrate the wins when you have wins. Celebrate the little wins as well as the big ones. Yesterday, I texted my sister telling her how excited I was that I finally made it through a barre pilates class without starting to black out. That’s a victory. That’s progress. It’s small but small things are important to you. Sometimes the highlight of your day is getting a good parking spot or getting in a short line at Walmart. And that’s okay. That’s more than okay. That’s awesome. Celebrate it. Own it.

I’m learning lately to be okay with who I am, strengths AND weaknesses. They all make up who I am. They all offer me room for growth and ways to glorify God. A few months ago I wrote in my journal how I wanted to be like a couple of famous writers who are known for their words. I wanted to be big. And I just had this overwhelming assurance from God that he didn’t need me to be big. He needed me to be small. He reminded me that my role models were small before they were big and that now was my time to be small. So here I am. Living in a small state, in a small town, in a small bedroom learning to be okay with being small.

I don’t know if this makes much sense to anyone but myself but I think it’s important to share what’s on my heart sometimes and this is on my heart. In the spirit of authenticity, I am sharing this without a picture and I am letting you know that I had trouble spelling authenticity because I am a HORRIBLE speller. Seriously, I would have had a lot more trouble in English classes had I been born prior laptops and spellcheck becoming the standard practice.

Is anyone else going through a season of life that seems counter intuitive to culture? Let me know!

How to Succeed in College Without Really Trying

How to Succeed in College Without Really Trying

My college career has ended, and my little sister is preparing to leave for college, even though she’s still a baby who can’t be old enough for college. I’ve been reflecting on the things I’ve done during college. Some are things I am thankful for, while others are ones I wish I had been wise enough to avoid. So without further ado here are my tips to succeed in college.

  1. Find your place and find yourself

High school can be hard and limiting, socially. College, on the other hand, has a place for everyone. I found my place in the Mississippi State University Ballroom Dance Club and with the Baptist Student Union (BSU). BSU allowed me to grow spiritually and gave me the opportunity to do missions in Orlando for ten weeks. The ballroom club helped me get in shape, develop better posture (my posture used to drive my mom crazy!) and gave me something that makes me feel joy. I cannot imagine my life if I hadn’t had an RA who was involved with the club. Thanks Liz!

You don’t have to do these things but you should do something. If you wanna join a sorority, go for it. If you wanna be a member of the Brony Club, I won’t judge you. Well maybe a little but that’s the great thing about college. It’s the time to do what you what to do and say, “I don’t care what other people think. They can think I’m weird but I’m okay with that.” One day, my freshman year I wore a frilly pink shirt and pants with low heels and a headband that looks like it belongs to a medieval. I shamelessly told people that today was princess day and didn’t care if they thought I was weird, and it worked.

Both the BSU and dance club have given me opportunities to grow as a person and given me the opportunity to meet awesome people. In fact, I found my junior year roommates, Claire Cook and Krista Smith, through my family group at the BSU. Which leads me to my next point…

  1. Choose your roommates wisely

You don’t have to be best friends with the people you live with. You don’t even have to like them. But you do need to be able to live with them. If you like things to be clean, don’t live with your super fun but super messy friend, and, of course, vice versa. If you want a quiet home, live with your mellow friends. If you want home to always be exciting and fun, live with people who are lighthearted and fun. Basically, just figure out what you want home to feel like, and see who you know that fits in that. I don’t like to talk in the morning so I need roommates who understand why I seem moody at 7 a.m. They have to know I don’t hate them; I’m just not ready for the world yet.

However, I want to dispel a myth. It is totally possible to live with your best friend. I lived in a small dorm room with my best friend during my sophomore year. And you know what? She’s still my best friend. We had to be mature enough to let things go sometimes. But the only recurring issue was that she is hot-natured, and I’m cold-natured. There were times when I froze and she burned up, but we lived to tell the tale.

  1. Be a good roommate

It’s not all on them to make you comfortable. Living with people requires give and take. You may know their worst qualities but that just means they know yours as well. Keep that in mind and try to be someone easy to live with. If you have a problem, don’t be passive aggressive. Get it out in the open!

  1. Make friends with people in class and your major

My sophomore year I sat by a girl named Caroline Caver in Communication Theory, one of my favorite classes (Shout out to Dr. Nicholson). Eventually we worked together at Chickfila and ended up in a handful of classes together. Even though we didn’t hang out or anything, when I missed classes or couldn’t remember due dates, she’s someone I could rely on to help me out. There are a handful of other people that I always looked for on the first day of class or tried to pair up with during group projects. It’s always comforting to know there’s a classmate you can trust to proof your grammar (looking at you, Jake Jones!).

  1. Find someone a year or two ahead of you in your major

Seriously, this is one of the most important things that helped me. Through the BSU, I met Jamie Lott. Jamie was also getting a degree in Communication with a concentration in Public Relations, but Jamie was a year ahead of me. While we were both students at MSU, Jamie was constantly giving me advice about which teachers and classes to take. Even during my senior year, she was an invaluable help, always there to talk me off the ledge affectionately known as “PR Orgs.”

  1. Internships

Now, we come to the regrets. I was involved in a couple, low-key internships in college, but if I could start over now, I would definitely take off a summer and get an internship that gave me tons of experience even if it was unpaid. Looking for jobs is hard, and I wonder if I would have a better chance with more connections and more experience. Maybe things would be exactly the same for me, but who knows.

  1. Work out

Take advantage of the gym membership included in your tuition. Chances are this is a much nicer gym than anything you’ve used. It’s also a great stress reliever, and if you’re in college, you need stress relief. But more than that, get in the habit of being healthy and working out while you still have a decent metabolism. You will gain weight in college unless you make a real effort not to stay in shape or have super awesome metabolism and most of us don’t. Fun fact: you can’t eat a #1 from Chickfila every night in the Union and not gain weight. It’s just not possible.

  1. Get Involved

Wait, Jackie, didn’t you already cover this in point number one when you said “Find your place?”

Hold your horses! When I say get involved, I don’t mean you should be associated with just one or two organizations. College campuses have such a vast array of people and opportunities. The more involved you are, the people you meet. During my first BSU meeting at MSU, the president of MSU, Mark Keenum, spoke and said,

“Five years from now you will be the same person except for the people you meet and the books you read.”

So meet as many different people as you can. Meet and develop friendships with people that have opposing views or different backgrounds than you. It will make you a better person.

I loved BSU and ballroom dance club but if I could start over, being more involved is something else I would change. There were so many things I thought about doing but for whatever reason (some valid, some not), I didn’t, and who knows what I could have gained from that experience.

So to all you soon to be college freshman, especially Mikayla, go out and enjoy and succeed in college! I am here for you and rooting for you.

P.S. It’s ok if you change your major, and it’s ok if it takes more than four years to graduate. Seriously, a big percentage of people have to go an extra semester or two. It’s not the end of the world.

Hey people who’ve been there, done that, what advice did I leave out that would help someone else? Let me know in the comments!

Now, enjoy some of my favorite pictures from college including a lot of the people talked about in this post.

Mikayla and I as little girls. Can you say

Mikayla and I as little girls. Can you say “Best Friends Forever”

picture of me and both my sisters

Mikayla, Chandler and I when Mikayla graduated.

Hannah Peay, Kelsee McKim, Sarah Carpenter and Tessa Brennan were my amazing group members during Orgs class.

Hannah Peay, Kelsee McKim, Sarah Carpenter and Tessa Brennan were my amazing group members during Orgs class.

Roommate senior year:

Roommate senior year: “This is what slowly losing your mind looks like.” One of my great (and fun) roommates

Jamie and me at a super cold football game. She was my college mentor and one of my favorite people!

Jamie and me at a super cold football game. She was my college mentor and one of my favorite people!

Nandita is just one of the great friends I met thru ballroom dance. She's gorgeous, talented and super smart

Nandita is just one of the great friends I met thru ballroom dance. She’s gorgeous, talented and super smart

Carley was my kids club partner during summer missions.

Carley was my kids club partner during summer missions.

This little doll was one of the girls I bonded with during kids club. She's from Ireland, and I still miss her occasionally.

This little doll was one of the girls I bonded with during kids club. She’s from Ireland, and I still miss her occasionally.

Emily Pogue, my college sophomore roommate and best friend with me at a football game.

Emily Pogue, my college sophomore roommate and best friend with me at a football game.

This was before a football game with some of the sweet friends I made thru BSU. Erin Bristol/soon to be Alford, Emily Pogue, Anna Matheny and Kimbo (Kimberly if you wanna be proper) Keel

This was before a football game with some of the sweet friends I made thru BSU. Erin Bristol/soon to be Alford, Emily Pogue, Anna Matheny and Kimbo (Kimberly if you wanna be proper) Keel

I was such an awesome student they named a hall after me. Strangely enough it was for architects but I didn't argue

I was such an awesome student they named a hall after me. Strangely enough it was for architects but I didn’t argue

At orientation getting ID's with Chelsie Jackson. I always joke that I look as pale as a vampire here.

At orientation getting ID’s with Chelsie Jackson. I always joke that I look as pale as a vampire here.

Dancing the tango with DJ

Dancing the tango with DJ

Claire, Melanie and Jamie showing me how well they can stretch

Claire, Melanie and Jamie showing me how well they can stretch

This is one of my roommates, Emily Akers, looking super cool with a light saber

This is one of my roommates, Emily Akers, looking super cool with a light saber

My rock ministries family! I miss y'all!

My rock ministries family! I miss y’all!

Performed with these girls 3 times a week for a summer. Lots of bonding happened.

Performed with these girls 3 times a week for a summer. Lots of bonding happened.

Picture of a sunset and the American flag

Updates and Changes

Hey Y’all,

I have a few things to cover today.

For those of you who don’t know, I graduated! Huzzah! On May 1, I completed my last assignment as an undergraduate student at Mississippi State University. Talk about bittersweet! Starkville and MSU will always hold a special place in my heart and I will forever look back at my time with a smile in my heart. I’ll talk more about that soon. But for now here’s a site update!

Because I am entering into a new stage of life, I have chosen to change my site from “” to “” I’ve been considering doing this for a while for many reasons.

First and foremost, my focus on quotes as inspiration for posts has been waning. My love of quotes and it’s influence on so many of my early posts no longer shapes the way I write. I will continue to incorporate quotes when I feel it is necessary to strengthen a point with others words. However, somewhere along the way my style of writing evolved from building off of others to standing on its own to feet. With this in mind, I no longer felt comfortable writing under the name “the quotes diary” and not focusing on quotes in my writing. I stopped feeling free to write what I wanted.

Second, I want it to be something people can remember and understand. I do not write for notoriety; however, I want people to easily recognize who is behind the words. If something I write resonates with people, I want them to be able to return to the site and not have to remember both my name and the site’s name. Now they are one and the same.

I have also changed the site layout to something a little more sleek and sophisticated. It’s simple and clean that, in my opinion, allows the reader to focus on the words rather than the layout.

I hope you’ll continue to keep reading. I am going to attempt to write more consistently. I hear from all the greats that writing is a job and you have to sit down at the keyboard and write whether you are inspired or not. Soon I’ll update you on my post grad life and maybe even  create a book list for those of you looking for recommendations.

Love, Jackie


Have you ever noticed how when you’re closer to God, you literally see the world thru a different lens? It’s one of those things you forget both when haven’t been close to God in a while and when you’ve been faithful for a while. You’re only aware of the lenses in that twilight space.

I am in that twilight space and it’s kind of astounding me.

One of my favorite tv shows is called Community. It’s this quirky tv show that’s occasionally self aware and is constantly talking about other movies and tv shows. It also takes place at a community college that somehow gives out four year degrees… Don’t question it! It’s perfect for someone like me who enjoys consuming media. However, it’s not the cleanest show. In fact, it can be offensive and irreverent, though, always in a clever way.

I started rewatching it this week because it felt like a good ending to college.

In the first scene of the show, main character Jeff is having a conversation with Abed. It ends like this:
Jeff: “Now I see your value, Abed.”
Abed (as Jeff walks out of hearing distance):That’s the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.

And it hit me. At our core, that’s what we’re all looking for. We look for it in every interaction and every relationship. We’re secretly, subconsciously waiting for someone, anyone, everyone to say: I see your value. You have value and I have noticed it.

But the thing is others aren’t here to give us value. If they were, we’d be in a sad state. Think about it. You’re more concerned with others affirming you than you are about affirming others. With a few exceptions, everyone else is doing the same thing. We get so wrapped up in our heads that we quit worrying about others.

As a christian, you should seek to find your value affirmed in Jesus, the one who said I value you, you so much I am going to subject myself to torment so that you can avoid it.

Your value is in Christ and nothing else. You are valuable because he loves you and saved you and gives you value.

Your value doesn’t rely on your talents or how smart or how pretty or how strong you are. Your value doesn’t lie in your ability to make friends or your relationship status. Those things are good but they do not give you value. And when we choose to find value in these things, we cheapen Christ’s sacrifice and give away some of our real value.

You have value. It is given to you by Christ. Acknowledge it. Revel in it.

And while I don’t think we should find value from others, maybe we should start acknowledging the value we see in others.

Tell her she is clever. Tell him he is passionate. Point out the good things you see in people. People are often blind to their own strengths and weaknesses, be their mirror. See value in people. See value in everyone.

March is my mother’s month

Did you know that March is colon cancer awareness month? Probably not. It’s not exactly common knowledge even though it kills more than 50,000 people every year, which makes it the second leading cause of cancer related death, behind only lung cancer. 

In fact, it’s almost the end of March, too late to be writing a colon cancer awareness month post. But I forget. Nobody reminded me. I didn’t see blue (colon cancer awareness color) everywhere. There weren’t commercials on the tv or radio. 

But there should be. It’s the second most prevalent type of cancer. I should hear so much about it, I’m sick by the end of March. 

Ok, so what? Why do you care? 

Valid question. I have a good answer. 10 years ago, my 41 year old mother was diagnosed with stage 3 colon cancer. 

For those who don’t know, Cancer has 4 stages. Stage 4 is the worst. There is no best when the word “cancer” is involved, but you have a pretty good chance with stage 1 and not much if it’s stage 4. Still, you never know if cancer is gonna be a tornado -tearing down things down it’s unpredictable but narrow path – or a tsunami -devastating everything, quickly and unexpectedly. 

Actually I don’t know if that’s true. I’m not an oncologist but it seems to me that, regardless of the diagnosis, cancer is unpredictable. 

I’m going around the world to tell a simple but emotional story. 

10 years ago, with irony befitting a book or movie, my mother was diagnosed with stage 3 colon cancer in the middle of colon cancer awareness month. She’s been in remission for I guess 9 years now which is amazing. My mother is a fighter. She’s strong. Maybe because she’s strong or because she had so much to live for or because that’s what you do when you’re attacked. I don’t know. To be truthful, I don’t remember it well. I remember staying with a family friend the day my mom had half of her colon removed. I remember all the food people sent to help take care of us. I remember the metallic smell of her breath most vividly of all. I still hate the smell of my hands after holding change. The smell envelopes me in overwhelming fear and sadness. But I don’t really remember how I felt or what I thought or even understood. 

It’s also national women’s history month. I’ve been wanting to honor the ladies that impacted me and shown me what true strength is. No one has impacted and has more strength than my mom. She showed that the most when she had no strength and fought anyway. 

To all the cancer patients: keep fighting. No matter the odds. Don’t go down without a fight. 

To all the family members: life is hard. What you’re doing is one of the hardest things to face in life. You will make it. No matter what happens you’ll get past it. 

To my mom: thank you. Thank you so much for beating the odds. Thank you for teaching me how to deal with illness, attending my high school graduation, giving wisdom during my first heartbreak, dealing with meltdowns, and everything else you’ve done in the past ten years since cancer tried to kill you. I love you.

So go get colonoscopies and honor the women who’ve made a positive impact on you. 

Happy women’s history and colon cancer awareness month. 

The Beginner’s Guide to Audrey Hepburn Movies

The Beginner's Guide to Audrey Hepburn Movies

In a recent post, I talked about how great Audrey Hepburn was, both as a person and as an actress. One of my friends read it and said she’d never seen any Audrey Hepburn movies except for the beginning of Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Since Breakfast at Tiffany’s is a bit slow and somber, my friend got bored and quit watching. While I think everyone should watch Audrey Hepburn movies, Breakfast at Tiffany’s, contrary to popular opinion, isn’t my favorite of her movies and I could have told my friend that she would get bored watching it. Having been a fan from a young age, I am going to use my knowledge to create a guide for Audrey Hepburn.

Audrey Hepburn walking down the stairs for a photo shoot in Funny Face

I want that dress!

Funny Face

The first Audrey movie you should watch is Funny Face. In this delightful, light-hearted flick, the editor and photographer of a prestigious fashion magazine scheme to get an intellectual, too good for plebeian things like a fashion magazine, funny looking girl to model in Paris for them. Hijinks ensue. People fall in love; it is Paris, after all. It even won an Oscar for best costume design. The costumes were designed by Edith Head and Hubert de Givenchy, so no surprise there. The outfits are absolutely sumptuous. It’s also a cute musical without having too many long or boring singing scenes. Bonus: It features Fred Astaire dancing and being suave. Seriously, I could fall in love with Fred’s dancing.


“I have learned how to live, how to be IN the world and OF the world, and not just to stand aside and watch. And I will never, never again run away from life. Or from love, either.- Sabrina Fairchild”

The next movie newbies should watch is Sabrina. However, if for people that aren’t big on musicals, an alternative is to watch Sabrina first. Sabrina is about the daughter of a chauffeur who is hopelessly in love with the David Larrabee, playboy extraordinaire and son of the family her father works for. Sabrina’s father sends her to cooking school in Paris for a twofold reason: to learn useful skills and to forget about David. However, Sabrina returns still in love with David and no longer looking like a little girl. When David notices her, nobody else besides Sabrina is happy. Things get a little complicated and crazy in the best way possible. This costars William Holden and Humphrey Bogart. It also won an Oscar for Best Costume Design so it won’t be a disappointment after the fashion world in Funny Face. Bonus: There’s a remake made in 1995 starring Julia Ormond, Harrison Ford and Greg Kinnear. It manages to stay relevant to the times and makes changes without straying from the integrity or feel of the original.

My Fair Lady

The next movie I think people should watch is My Fair Lady.  This is my personal favorite Audrey Hepburn movie and in my top 10 favorite movies overall. However, it is a little long. The plot revolves around Henry Higgins, a phonetics professor who makes a bet that he can make Eliza Doolittle, a lowly flower girl, presentable in high society by teaching her to speak with a different dialect. Of course, they fall in love despite their differences.  The above scene in the YouTube link is one of my favorite scenes in all the movies I’ve ever scene and the main focus isn’t ever on the main characters. That says a lot about how great this movie is. Every single detail is golden. There’s even one scene where Eliza imagines getting the king to chop off Henry Higgins head. This film is a great example of a movie that’s really well done, lots of fun to watch and makes people think about society and how little things like language affect the way we perceive others. It was directed by George Cukor, the original director for Gone with the Wind who secretly coached Vivien Leigh and Olivia de Havilland after he was fired. The movie got 8 Oscars including best director, best actor in a leading role (Shout out to the great Rex Harrison) and, you guessed it, best costume design by Cecil Beaton. Bonus: This movie is adapted from the book Pygmalion.

Breakfast at Tiffany’s

Breakfast at Tiffany's

“I’m like cat here, a no-name slob. We belong to nobody, and nobody belongs to us. We don’t even belong to each other.”

The quintessential Audrey Hepburn movie. The movie that popularized the “Little Black Dress.” This movie, based on the book of the same name by Truman Capote, is sad and moving and deep while also managing to be fun and visually gorgeous. You feel for Holly Golightly. She breaks your heart and makes you cry. This is a movie that has to be felt rather than seen. One fun part is when she helps out the mob without even realizing it.

Bonus: you’ll want to go to Tiffany’s and eat breakfast to get over the mean reds.

How to Steal a Million

The most unknown and underrated Audrey Hepburn movie is How to Steal a Million. Also set in Paris, this fun heist flick costars, the young and ever so adorable Peter O’Toole. I can’t really go into the plot without taking away some of the fun but you should definitely check it out.

So there you have it. The first five Audrey Hepburn movies you should watch. The good news is all except for My Fair Lady are available to stream on Netflix. After you watch these, check out Roman Holiday and Charade* then go to amazon and buy What Would Audrey Do or How to Be a Hepburn in a Hilton World.

*The first time I started Charade I only watched the first 30 minutes and got bored and gave up. The next time I made it through the beginning to where it gets really good. It a great, very underrated caper movie. It will have your head spinning! Check it out.

Obviously, this is all subjective. Please share if you agree with my opinions! I’ll leave you with the words of the lovely lady.

“Nothing is impossible. The word itself says ‘I’m possible!’ “